Basicwomen's Blog

{October 27, 2010}   How to identify if your child has an inferiority complex?

Nidarshana Sharma


-by Nidarshana Sharma

We all want our children to be self-confident and content. We want them to make good friends and learn from others. We want them to interact with people of different backgrounds so that they understand others better. We want them to sharpen their skills and constantly improvise and strive to be the best. In a nutshell, we want our children to stand out and be a winner.

Quite unfortunately, while most of us know what we want of our children, often we fail to realize how they can go about getting to the top. We do recognize that our child must be encouraged to open up but we don’t see how we can do it. Being a winner is not just about building your strengths, but it also means identifying and rectifying your weaknesses. As a parent, how can you ensure that your child is walking on the right path? You need to analyze your child’s core weaknesses and help him/her overcome them.

Many children have many different kinds of shortcomings. One could be short-tempered and the typical tantrum-throwing child, while the other could simply be disinterested in everything. The most problematic among these is breeding an inferiority complex.

What is an inferiority complex? It is a feeling in one’s mind that he/she is inferior to others in some way. It is natural for us to feel inferior to some people due to various reasons. But an inferiority complex is an extended feeling of discouragement which is not easy to overcome. Often when we feel inferior, we compensate for it by working harder and pushing ourselves to the brim to achieve something. This gives a feeling of accomplishment and we feel good and confident about ourselves. But a person who suffers from a complex may not be in the right state of mind to walk that extra mile to prove himself/herself. In the process, he/she might start pretending to be very confident or just get into a shell.

An inferiority complex could have many causes. A child may be a victim of domestic or emotional abuse. Also before a child turns six, they has very high retention power. Whatever the child is taught then, he/she grows up to remember that. If you reprimand your child regularly or taunt/ mock him/her or constantly point out his/her shortcomings, it is likely that the child feels low about himself/herself. Sometimes, a physical or a mental defect is also a reason to feel inferior. Many a time, social factors also play a role. A girl child who is constantly shunned for being so, may grow up to be very timid and meek.

As parents, we must make sure that however our child is, we must encourage him/her and never let him/her down. Nobody in this world is perfect and we have no right to remind others of their weaknesses when we ourselves are filled with many. If your child is very submissive or scared to talk or socialize then you know that he/she needs to get rid of that inferiority complex. Similarly, if your child is too aggressive or rebellious or over-confident, talk to them her and explain the importance of being confident and sure. Humility and politeness are two traits that you must master and also teach your children. Listen to your children, let them do their own thing, show them cartoons or read to them stories about bravery and boldness. Teach them to be straightforward and open. Be nice to them and never discourage them. Do not call them names but be as positive as you can. When your child is surrounded by a cheerful and positive environment, they will surely be infected by it and be a star!

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